Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Retarded joke that make me laugh
Ask me if I'm an orange.
Are you an orange?
Yes. Ask me if I'm an apple.
Are you an apple?
No. I'm an orange.
Are you an orange?
Yes. Ask me if I'm an apple.
Are you an apple?
No. I'm an orange.
Mecca's that way!
Keep the direction of Mecca with you at all times...
Because forgetting can cost you your life!!!
Because forgetting can cost you your life!!!
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Top 5 most depressing movies that rock, 2000-2010
This movie is so amazingly depressing that it'll take days to get over. If you're feeling great and want to be brought back to reality, then way further down to depression, this is the right choice. Warnings: don't try on a date, don't watch while consuming narcotics, and definitely do not show this to mom.
Grimy, dark, brooding...basically all the elements you need to take a nice bright outlook and tear it down to shreds. The evolution of the film will empty you, and the ending will fill the emptiness with depression.
This movie makes you glad to be alive, but also makes you feel slightly sick. Do not watch if you're claustrophobic. One positive thing, however, is how good air feels after watching this.
You just can't help but feel horrible for this guy. Wake up every morning and find tattooed on your chest the most horrible reality staring back at you, because you can't remember it otherwise. Just brutal.
Less of an "oh my god I want to curl up in a corner and possibly sip on hot chocolate" than the other, but definitely a heart wrencher. It's sad to see a grown man cry. Especially one who can tear off your limbs.
Saturday, October 23, 2010
10 reasons Obama sucks
1. He's deteriorating the incentive to produce value by imposing unreasonably high taxes to America's top earners and job creators
2. He is actively socializing the automobile, health care, and banking industries, effectively encouraging them to be as ineffective as they can
3. He is destroying the "American Dream" by turning a once free country into a socialist nightmare
4. He's totally unqualified - a 10th grader knows more about macroeconomics than he does
5. He's anti-imperialism, which means he's basically doing everything in his power to reduce the strength of the US
6. He speaks so well he can convince you that it's good thing to become a third world country - and that's exactly what he's doing
7. His wife, voted most powerful woman in the world in Forbes magazine (October 25, 2010 edition), is actually a banshee
8. He thinks printing money is the way to create lasting value
9. His health care program will make nearly 100 million people lose their employer-sponsored health plans
10. No he can't
- hurts big business and kills small business
2. He is actively socializing the automobile, health care, and banking industries, effectively encouraging them to be as ineffective as they can
- you'll have a crappy car, which you'll crash - then you'll have fun using deteriorated savings to complement your insurance
3. He is destroying the "American Dream" by turning a once free country into a socialist nightmare
- being an American won't be cool anymore
4. He's totally unqualified - a 10th grader knows more about macroeconomics than he does
- we need to go back in time and give him another decade of schooling
5. He's anti-imperialism, which means he's basically doing everything in his power to reduce the strength of the US
- this comes from his dad - check out what he's doing to help others at the expense of the US
6. He speaks so well he can convince you that it's good thing to become a third world country - and that's exactly what he's doing
- when he gets on stage, i would sell my grandmother for Obama, except I'd get taxed so much it probably wouldn't be worth it
7. His wife, voted most powerful woman in the world in Forbes magazine (October 25, 2010 edition), is actually a banshee
- here's the proof
8. He thinks printing money is the way to create lasting value
- hyperinflation may not be so far-fetched
9. His health care program will make nearly 100 million people lose their employer-sponsored health plans
- check your email - your HR director probably emailed you about the insurance benefit you just lost
10. No he can't
- and he won't ever be able to either
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